Padme Amidala: “I don’t need more security, I need answers. I want to know who is trying to kill me.”
Obi-Wan Kenobi: “We’re here to protect you Senator, not to start an investigation.”
Anakin Skywalker: “We will find out who is trying to kill you, Padme. I promise you.”
Obi-Wan: “We will not exceed our mandate, my young Padawan learner.”
Anakin: “I meant in the interest of protecting her, Master, of course.”
Obi-Wan: “We are not going through this exercise again, Anakin. And you will pay attention to my lead.”
Anakin: “Why else do you think we were assigned to her, if not to find the killer? Protection is a job for local security… not Jedi. It’s overkill, Master. Investigation is implied in our mandate.”
Obi-Wan: “We will do as the Council has instructed,… and you will learn your place, young one.”
Star Wars II: Attack of the Clones
I have been saying those words over
inside my head thse last couple of days because Padawan Learner has made a very different choice than I would have made way back when for what is, without being over-simplistic about it, a potentially pivotable point in his life. I look back and think about those few times in my life when I made (or chose not to make) a decision that had an impact on the direction of the rest of my life. This feels, and very probably is, one of those moments in our young man’s life.
Yup. Very different. It has re-emphasized how different we are as people. How easy it is to get emotionally wrapped up in your own image of someone else and someone else’s future. Not bad, I should state that right off, but very different. I know I’ll look back in 15 years and most likely not even think about this single decision, but that is shallow reassurance right now.
They don’t tell you in the parenting books how hard it is to watch your kids make big decisions, to not step in and force a direction (the “right” direction as you see it), to be encouraging, and honest, and respectful. How not to care – for lack of a better word – so much, while still loving with all your heart.
The Emperor: “Rise my friend.”
Darth Vader: “The Death Star will be completed on schedule.”
The Emperor: “You’ve done well, Lord Vader. And now I sense you wish to continue your search for young Skywalker.”
Darth Vader: “Yes, my Master.”
The Emperor: “Patience, my friend. In time, he will seek you out, and when he does, you must bring him before me. He has grown strong. Only together can we turn him to the Dark Side of the Force.”
Darth Vader: “As you wish.”
The Emperor: “Everything is proceeding as I have foreseen.”
Star Wars VI: Return of the Jedi
OK, time to brag a bit.
I just received a letter from the school where Padawan Learner takes his duel-enrollment classes stating that he has been recognized by his Energy and Sustainability instructor for “outstanding accomplishments in the field of study.” PL will be recognized at a student assembly in a few weeks for this honor.
How cool is that?
Dad Windu tells me that he’s afraid my last post might have given some the impression that I am dissatisfied with what PL is becoming, but nothing is farther from the truth. I am quite proud of who Padawan Learner is growing to be; it is simply different from what I assumed he would be (based on my own interests, experiences, prejudices - if we’re being honest - and expectations). Frankly, I assumed he would be a blend of Dad Windu and I, which he most definitely is not.
Padawan Learner, for both his strengths and his weaknesses, is very much his very own person – and someone that I’m proud to call my son.
Padme: ”Ani? My goodness, you’ve grown.”
Anakin: ”So have you, grown more beautiful… for a senator, I mean.”
Padme: ”Ani, you’ll always be that little boy I knew on Tatooine.”
Star Wars II: Attack of the Clones
Today, Padawan Learner signed up to be a volunteer at our local nature center as part of their Youth Volunteer Group, which is run at the same time as their homeschooling classes for younger children. When I told him about it, he was interested but wanted to know more about what he would be doing. While it would have been easy for me to send out a quick email, I knew that it would mean more for him to find out for himself.
So I drove us out to the nature center after lunch today. Once we got there, he went about asking for the homeschooling program director and getting the information he wanted. It was, well, just so nice seeing him take charge of making this decision. He listened to what she said, asked a few questions, and decided to sign on to volunteer once a month.
I couldn’t be prouder.