Things Worth Remembering The three habits that lead to success are: Patience, Application, and Vision.
It is always better to be underestimated.
There are three things that are better than riches: Health, Freedom, and Honor.
Think swiftly, speak softly, act wisely.
All from: The Book of Celtic Wisdom
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“Nevertheless, I’m taking Captain Solo and his friends. You can either profit by this or be destroyed. It’s your choice, but I warn you not to underestimate my power.” – Luke Skywalker, Star Wars VI: Return of the Jedi
When Padawan Learner was just a wee little guy, wrapped snugly in his blankets, sleeping calmly and silently through the night (yes, I understand that many of you will now be compelled to hate me for that statement), I assumed that he would be a traditional scholar. A multiple degree-holding academic of the first order. He would love learning for its own sake and almost compulsively read through the local library system. When he was a two year old chipping golf balls in the front yard and chasing down soccer balls in the back, I assumed he would be a traditional scholar who rode into college with both academic and athletic scholarships. When he was a five year old kindergartener, bored by reading lesson because he already knew how to read, I assumed he would be a traditional scholar, sought after athlete, who also was accelerated through multiple grades.
A decade later, my son is not a traditional scholastic academic, is not fighting off athletic recruiters, and is not advanced for his years. He struggles with math (sorry to have shared that with you, kiddo), doesn’t much care for science (although physics is considered interesting enough), and couldn’t really care less about the humanities. Oh, the humanities! He hates to write, which is proof positive that he is Dad Windu’s child. He’s a strong, if not regular reader, given to fits and starts of recreational reading. Oh, and he’s not a stellar athlete either. Definitely athletic, and given to strange and frightening leaps and twists on the trampoline – 9.8 last weekend, thank you very much – but probably not collegiate level. Sound grim to you? I’d be more upset about it, if I didn’t know that he’s a pretty normal kid.
He’s got a serious girlfriend (just shoot me now) who seems nice enough, with enough family baggage to cause an appropriate amount of maternal concern. He knows that teen romances rarely last, but he’s interested in giving it a try. He wants to, maybe, go to college for video game design, but mostly he just wants to play them. He has an absolute passion for parkour that makes my stomach lurch, his hands raw, and his pants ripped. He isn’t very good at keeping track of his schedule or his stuff yet, but is learning that if you don’t pack a lunch for school you get pretty hungry in the afternoon. He likes to roam around the downtown area with his best friend who is probably going to move back to Texas this summer, so he’s scraping to spend time with her because he has already learned that moving away means you probably won’t have much contact after that. He’s learning to enjoy the moment and accepting the “seasonality” of most friendships.
He’s learning that it doesn’t matter what you say you want, if you don’t do anything about it. He’s learning that there’s a limit to what your parents are willing to take when it comes to attitude and behavior. He’s learning that consequences for poor chooses are, by their very nature, often unpleasant and decidedly un-fun. He’s learning that laundry doesn’t care for itself, clear skin doesn’t just happen, showers don’t magically sparkle, and that it’s easier to take care of things than to catch up on things.
He’s learning from others, too. A boy his age has taught him that being in the 98th percentile on a high stakes standardized test isn’t nearly as impressive when you’re also a self-centered jerk 98% of the time. He’s learning that some people have an easier time understanding certain things, but all the “smarts” in the world don’t mean a thing if you can’t be bothered to do the work. Conversely, he’s noticed that fighting for a solid C is better than someone else throwing away an easy A because they couldn’t be bothered to show up for class. He’s learned that some mistakes, especially relationship mistakes, can last a lifetime. He’s seen how long $45,000 in student loans takes to pay off, especially if you never graduate and have to work two jobs just to support yourself and your not-so-sexy debt. He doesn’t enjoy math, but he understands compound interest.
Ultimately, he’s recognizing that “intelligence” goes hand in hand with effort, just like “luck” goes fastest to the best prepared. He’s learning that no one can do the work for you, make you want something enough to fight for it, or set your path before you. These things – he’s learning – must come from within himself. He’s a bright one, that son of mine, and I know he will go just as far as he chooses to go.
Palpatine: “You don’t need guidance, Anakin. In time, you will learn to trust your feelings. Then, you will be invincible. I have said it many times, you are the most gifted Jedi I have ever met.”
Anakin: “Thank you, Your Excellency.”
Palpatine: “I see you becoming the greatest of all the Jedi, Anakin. Even more powerful than Master Yoda.”
Star Wars II: Attack of the Clones
There’s nothing like knowing your kid is off doing something important that you have absolutely NO control over. Not that I have control issues or anything. Me? No, never. Oi vey. I’m a right regular basket case this morning.
Pet Shop Boys, OMD, Modern English, (vintage) U2, New Order, Echo & The Bunnymen, The Cure, Men Without Hats, INXS - I’m filling myself up with the comfort music of my high school and university years on Pandora Radio to keep myself sane. OK, I’ve just seriously dated myself. If I end up cutting my hair asymmetrically and dying it flame red, you’ll know why. Seriously, I really, really want to have flame read hair again. I blame that mostly on Ramona from Scott Pilgrim vs. the World though. (I’m also feeling compelled to dance with several of the songs as they play though, so daily exercise? Check.)
And tea, I’m drinking vats of tea: Santa’s Secret from my dear friend, Eileen Cook. This may or may not be a good idea as it’s packed full of caffeine and has real, miniature candy canes pieces scattered through out the mix, but that’s not going to stop me. I received a Saeco Electric Water Kettle for Christmas and Ho Boy! that thing rocks. Super fast water from the tap to 150-boiling in moments, and with the measurements on the side I can measure out just how much water I’m going to need.
Padawan Learner is taking the first half of his very first mid-term exam today, the verbal Italian segment. I spent all last night saying, “Shouldn’t you be studying for that Italian test?” only to keep hearing, “No, it’s under control.” He glanced over his notes, made a few pretty sounding utterances (strange, I know, but I really miss hearing those guttural G’s from his Dutch-language days), and watching an episode each of The Big Bang Theory and CSI before going to bed. Who IS this child and how could he have ever come from Dad Windu’s and my DNA? I was a compulsive study-freak in school and I’m pretty sure DW was too. I kept thinking – but thankfully not screaming out – “What the blazes does that have to do with anything? ” In the end, I went and finished up my latest library find (Death of a Valentine ) in the bathtub.
I really don’t have reason to worry too much, PL is doing well in his Energy and Italian classes, but I think one of the underlying reasons is that I feel a fair bit of pressure due to the fact that this is his first leap into the unknown of what is commonly referred to as “real school” by family and friends that were not terribly homeschool-friendly in the first place. This semester has felt like it is, in their eyes (and I fully admit that I could be completely projecting my own insecurities onto others here), the proof in the pudding of homeschooling in general and of our homeschool family in particular. How about you other homeschool to traditional school or duel-enrollment folk? Did you experience this the first time one of your kids started thinking inside the educational box?
OK, on to other things now. Like those dust bunnies lurking in the bathroom and under the beds. Time to slay them all.
Aunt Beru: “Luke’s just not a farmer, Owen. He has too much of his father in him.”
Owen: “That’s what I’m afraid of.”
Star Wars IV: A New Hope
Saturday in Central Iowa was drop dead, autumn weather perfect.
Although we were going to visit the historical farms and 19th Century town at Living History Farms with Dad Windu’s parents this weekend, they decided (at rather the last minute) that it wasn’t a good time to visit since his mother wasn’t feeling her best. Pulling on our big boy/girl pants, DW and I decided to go check it out anyway while Padawan Learner was at trampoline class. We enjoyed it so much, we hosed Padawan Learner off and went right back for the rest of the day.
A few pictures for you to enjoy:
This Ioway Native American lodge looked downright cozy.
Traditional medicinal plants and their uses were identified in and near the Ioway farm camp.
The one-room (with loft) Frontier Cabin…
and it’s matching lean-to barn/shed. One of the things DW liked best about this set of historic farms is that they had live farm animals and (very informative) interpreters engaged in the daily tasks of farming life. I liked that they were NOT trying to pretend they were actually IN each farm’s stated time period. I know some people love that type of thing; I am not one of them.
On our way to the 1900 Farm, we spotted a stunning set of matching dappled gray draft horses participated in the farm’s annual weekend-long fall plowing contest. (I believe there’s one in the spring, too.) What a clever way for the LHF to quickly get their fields plowed. I wonder if a laundry contest could work in the apartment…
My heart never ceases to go pitter-patter when I see a big, beautiful barn like this one. The hay, grain and leather harnesses inside made it smell heavenly.
I’m pretty sure PL’s favorite part of the day was finding this sweet little kitty to love.
This interpreter said she started as an elementary summer camp attendee, 9 years ago, and has been involved with the LHF in one way or another every year since. Now that’s impressive, in my book. Did you know that Iowa has one of the highest rates of volunteerism in the nation? Just another reason to love this place.
This pantry and the prep area below had me drooling into the collar of my turtleneck (it was in the high 50s, after all).
Anyone know what that corrugated-looking thing in the corner is?
With such a scene as this, it almost makes a girl want to go boil up some laundry. Ok, but it does make me think of flapping sheets and towels on the clothes line.
This is similar to the treadle sewing maching that I remember from my great-grandmother’s house, which she had from her mother.
The 1950s kitchen from the Modern Farms exhibit stopped me cold (there was also a Modern Farm Kitchen; I found it pretty sterile looking). This little honey is almost an exact replica of the kitchen we had when we bought our Grand Rapids house all those years ago. I think it’s just lovely.
We had planned to go back the next day to watch the old-time baseball game, but found out while eating breakfast that Padawan Learner had (a shitload of) work that was due the next day for one of his public school classes that he figured “wouldn’t take that long.” Oh, the learning curve ride this kid is taking… He worked straight from 11am until we had to leave for a homeschool family potluck at 4pm and was back at it when we got home at 8:30 pm, finally finishing around 10:30pm. Nothing like learning the hard way to get your stuff done as it comes in, rather than waiting until the very end because you’ve got “lots of time to do it.” Dad Windu is finding all this very hard to be patient about, but I keep reminding him, “The fastest way to learn is to screw up.”
For those of you who didn’t check out the curriculum log over at The Jedi Academy, here are notes I made on Thursday and today about his Ocean project and some more work that we didn’t know about until later for the same class:
Padawan Learner’s Environmental Sustainability class found out Wednesday that their Oceans-related project – his is on the Smalleye Hammerhead Shark – which was scheduled to be due in late December, was being moved up to being due… this Friday… to meet the 6th week marking period. <snark>Ah, the logic to be found in grades-based public schooling.</snark> Therefore, we have pushed our homeschooling scheduled work off to Friday (after he gets back from his public school classes) and Saturday afternoon (after gymnastics/trampoline practice) so that he can spend today getting his ES project completed.
and
Considering Padawan Learner’s experience with “projects” last week at Public School and the fact that he has several more projects coming due in both Italian and Environmental Science, we’re taking the next week to do some (much needed) science review here in The Outer Rim, especially since we’ve just finished Unit I in Biology, a little more Pre-Algebra & Algebra review – a few things are still a little shaky – and to give him time to get these crazy Public School projects zipped up and out of the way. No more last minute project “emergencies” for us, please.
“Your feeble skills are no match for the power of the dark side. You have paid the price for your lack of vision.” – The Emperor, Star Wars VI: Return of the Jedi
Poor Padawan Learner. All these years he’s never had to learn to take proper notes from a book, but all that has changed.
With his move into high school classes and his interest in taking a whopper of a class next year (with Biology and/or Chemistry AND Algebra II as pre-requisites), I’m weaning him off the mom-directed manner that used to define how we homeschooled – you know, back before we were unschoolers. (Cue the maniacal laughter for the strangeness of the path PL has taken over the years.)
In past years, I drew up a daily to-do list with everything broken up into little bite-sized morsels of reading, math, and etc. In addition, we previously only used conversational assessment since I find test-taking so limited in its scope. It was easy for PL since he didn’t have to put any thought into how things were going to get completed, and it was lovely for me because I’m an uber planner. Different times require different methods though. As he becomes independent as a student – even making his own lunch the night before school without being reminded – I’m scheduling weekly- and chapter-based readings for the science, history and health-related books that he’s using. That means I’ll still be breaking his math and formal writing topics into 2-3 day chunks, since they require so much participation on my part ahead of time, but he’ll be setting the pace (to an extent) for his independent reading.
What about the note-taking though? Well, part of his independent reading task is taking good, detailed notes from the chapters read. I want to emphasize that: good, detailed notes. Yes, I’m being a stickler on these notes because this skill will be the foundation for any out-of-the house classes he’s bound to take in the future. PL is not enjoying this at present, but I didn’t expect that he would. He hates writing, mostly from lack of practice I do believe. The conversational manner of his education up to this point has been fantastic for comprehension and rationalization skills, but it has done so at the expense of his writing skills. I wrote up some good, quality notes from the introduction of his Art History book to show him an example of what to aim for, and explained that I knew it would take some time for him to get to that point.
I’ve also included section review sheets for his Biology and Physical Science books and will include chapter quizzes, a mid-term test, and a final exam. This is a completely new arena for both of us, but is the reality for the educational setting that he has chosen for the sciences. It would be a disservice to exclude them this year just because I find them so distasteful and limited in scope. We’ll also use the corrected section review sheets as a study guide for chapter quizzes and the larger tests to come. Ah, the skills one learns while taking traditional classes. They will serve him well.
Princess Leia: “Han!”
Han Solo: “Yes, Your Highnessness?”
Princess Leia: “I thought you decided to stay.”
Han Solo: “Well, the bounty hunter we ran into on Ord Mantell changed my mind.”
Star Wars V: The Empire Strikes Back
With apologies to the people who have already seen this on Facebook…
I did it. I signed Padawan Learner up for classes at a local high school last week.
Despite the fact that he had – for years – said that he never wanted to set foot inside a school again, PL decided that classes on environmental sustainability and Italian sounded too good not to attend. Despite the fact that he’s a confirmed night owl, he chose to take a class that starts at 7:55 am. Choice makes all the difference in the end, doesn’t it?
On days that he has school, his day will end at 2:15 pm - those will be every other school day – with a 2 hr study/lunch period in between the two classes. He also wanted to take an intro art class, but it had a waiting list of 40 students so he couldn’t add it this time – maybe next year. So I guess we’re about to join the ranks of tied-to-the-school-year families now. (We’ve even bought a few school supplies to get him through his first few days: a 1″ binder for each class, an insulated lunch box, a water bottle, and mechanical pencils. We already have a ton of paper and pens.)
About two hours after I signed him up, I had to point out the inconsistency of taking a class in environmental sustainability and leaving the deck slider door open when it is about a billion degrees outside and the AC is running.
Mace Windu: “I sense a plot to destroy the Jedi. The Dark Side of the Force surrounds the Chancellor.”
Ki-Adi-Mundi: “If he does not give up his emergency powers after the destruction of Grievous, he must be removed from office.”
Mace Windu: “The Jedi Council will have to take control of the Senate to ensure a peaceful transition.”
Yoda: “Hmm. To a dark place this line of thought will take us. Great care we must take.”
Star Wars III: Revenge of the Sith
Around January a thought occurred to me, what if Padawan Learner and I are allergic to something we’re eating? You see, Padawan Learner and I have issues. Skin issues, to be specific – lots of very stubborn plantar warts (both of us), eczema on the palms of my hands, and a foul, dirty-hair type smell that just radiated out of PL. The warts were just something we’ve both had for years and assumed that it was something we were just going to have to live with, just part of who we were. I figured my eczema was the same. But there was just no way that PL’s smell was something that could be ignored. Granted, the kid was exercising for hours a a time at trampoline and gymnastics classes, but YEOZA, the smell was intense and no amount of hair washing or showering did anything about it. Within a half-hour of washing up, it was back. I aired his room out daily. We cranked the windows open in the car – even in winter. Something had to be done. Many people said, “Oh, that’s just how boy’s smell,” and suggested that it would go away once he became interested in dating and cared about his appearance/hygiene. Trust me, he cared. He washed.
I thought back to another person I knew that used to have a similar smell, a very sour dirty-body smell despite being more than adequate in all the usual hygiene behaviors – showering, using an anti-perspirant/deodorant, brushing teeth twice a day, etc. He was a hard-core, junk food & what-are-veggies carnivore. His rancid smell seemed to disappear when he moved in with a staunch vegetarian who then did the bulk of the cooking. His smell disappeared quickly. I thought about what PL ate. Our meals were healthy and well-rounded, but he did eat a significant amount of animal protein in the form of eggs and – especially – cheese. Nearly as much of a “dairy-atarian” as his non-meat-eating friend, Biggs.
I remembered hearing once that vegans don’t stink because they weren’t ingesting any animal protein. Not knowing any, I didn’t know if it was true or not. That was another venue to check out. Dad Windu and I talked it over, including PL as much as we could – despite this one and only refrain of NOOOOO – and decided that February (the shortest month) would be when we went temporarily vegan. Well, lo-and-behold the smell was gone within 4 days. Nothing, nada, niets. The first time he got in the car after one of his marathon trampoline classes and I didn’t have to roll the windows down was an eye-opener. He actually smelled fresh after his workout.
We allowed our systems to clear out for February and began adding foods in, beginning with dairy. A glass of milk, a grilled cheese sandwich and tomato soup for dinner. It took about 1 hour for the smell to begin creeping in and 2 days for it to hit it’s maximum again. He also developed a patch of hives along this upper back. Dairy was out. We added everything back in slowly, but nothing else triggered the smell like dairy did and does.
As a side bonus, his warts cleared up without our even noticing once he was off dairy (mine are still there but at least aren’t growing or spreading), his acne has greatly improved, and my eczema is clear so long as I don’t goof up and slip in some dairy unawares. PL and I are walking, talking dairy-detectors now. When there’s dairy in something we don’t expect, his smell will flare up and skin breaks out and my eczema starts up again. Not terribly, but enough to remind us to read our labels more carefully again.
I got to thinking about this again as I made yet another batch of Red Leader’s Soft Vegan Ginger Cookies (or as we call them, Soft Jedi Ginger Cookies) this morning. They’re very good. Even Dad Windu, who doesn’t much like ginger, liked these cookies. Red Leader says these are her go-to ginger cookies, despite the fact that they’re vegan.
Obi-Wan: “Sorry, Master, the water fried my weapon.”
Qui-Gon: “You forgot to turn your power off again, didn’t you?”
Obi-Wan nods sheepishly.
Qui-Gon: “It won’t take long to recharge, but this is a lesson I hope you’ve learned, my young Padawan.”
Obi-Wan : “Yes, Master.”
Star Wars I: The Phantom Menace
Still alive and still in the middle of the moving drama. Here’s the situation in a nutshell:
- House was put up on the market in mid-March
- Come to find out, the realtor’s assistant works for the devil, the Galactic Empire or some other evil monstrosity like Sprawl-Mart and did a major f*ck-up on the listing – 4 days late, crappy pictures, pathetic blurb, etc.
- Realtor’s assistant apparently does not know how to use voicemail as messages were never returned before 48 hours, if at all.
- Realtor did not check assistant’s “work” until after week two of the listing when we had not gotten a single showing.
- Realtor assistant has now been fired/’quit’.
- Price on house was dropped twice.
- House finally sold last Thursday – yeah – but we’re taking a major bath on the price – boo. I’m walking away getting less than I paid for the place 12 years ago – after spending 40K on home improvements these past couple of years. Double boo. I spent most of the 29th in tears.
- BUT it is sold and we’re finally going to be together again. Quadruple yeah!
- I’ve shed about 1/2 of our furniture and all of our yard/garden/garage items. House and garage look like they’ve been robbed. Apartment will still look like a furniture store exploded inside it. It’s all about perspective.
- We’re hoping to close by the end of the month.
- I told Padawan Learner tonight, as we had a Mom’s dinner out, that he has given me the best Mother’s Day present ever in the way he has been handling this topsy-turvy, split household, back and forth to see Dad Windu, emotional roller-coaster of a move.
If all goes well, I’ll be able to write again in complete sentences and whole paragraphs soon.
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